I have to say it has been a rough month. Not horrible but hard.
Lots of hard days.
Growing up is hard. Parenting kids who are on the cusp of leaving the nest has been the hardest of all. This season of minor to adult transition with all the heartache, disappointments and just plain learning about self that comes with it has me holding back the tears and holding on to HOPE.
As I sat in the DMV waiting for my 16 year old to return from her driving test I failed at holding back those tears. I brought a book to pass the 15 minute eternity. I read about a father watching his adult daughter take care of her sick child. How proud he was, yet how vividly he remembered her as his little girl so many years ago.
I watch my own children make decisions about their future; the same type of decisions that I made so many years ago, decisions that ultimately shaped the course of my life. I am not afraid they are going to make the wrong decisions, but the process of getting to a decision has been a road with bumps, turns and blind spots. We are still bumping along.
Some bumps hurt.
When the clarity of the road ahead seems blurry we pray for wisdom and strength and courage. We have had to change course a bit and of course it has not been a straight path.
January was a wild ride.
But my anecdote has been thankfulness.
I am thankful for all the episodes of Little House on the Prairie and Call the Midwife we enjoyed as a family. I am thankful for key lime pie and breakfast pastries at the French bakery in Cambria. I am thankful for opportunities even when they lead to closed doors (that is a hard one). I am thankful for the life lessons learned this month with the safety net called family and faith to soften the blows. I am thankful for the undaunted, independent spirits in my children. I am thankful for sunsets that take your breath away and roasting marshmallows over a fire. I am thankful for milestones met, the big ones like college acceptance letters and getting a drivers license. I am thankful for a call to simplicity to help focus me on on what really matters. There is so much more and as I write more thankfulness keeps pouring into my heart and mind.
It is a discipline really, learning to be thankful, remembering to be thankful. It is balm for the battle wounds. It is nourishment when you are starving for hope. Today I read the previous post I wrote on this topic called The Gift of Suniemi. I forget the lessons I learned a few years ago. I forget that God's got this.
God knows the big picture of my life, of each of my kid's lives and He knows the big picture of your life.
I have so much to be thankful for already this year even though it feels like we are wading through deep waters and in up to our necks. The wisdom of the Word speaks to me:
"Never stop praying.
Be thankful in all circumstances,
for this is God's will
for you who belong to Christ Jesus."
1 Thessalonians 5:17-18
May it speak to you too. Good riddance January!
February. . . bring it on!
Thanks for being here! I'm thankful for your presence.
February. . . bring it on!
Thanks for being here! I'm thankful for your presence.
Love,
Rachael